Everyone has a hero in their life...

It could be a Hollywood celebrity, a teacher, a social activist... the limitations are endless.

It could be more than one person or might not even be a person (say, a fictional character maybe?)

Who is your hero?

I know I have a whole lot of them, but there is one running around in my mind right this moment, saving my life (metaphorically speaking) as I write. This person is a hero to me in two different ways: how they make me feel and just how they are as a person. This hero of mine is one of my inspirations; they make me want to become a better person.

RE: What Is Love: The Key Traits

I've truly realized this in the last few days.

With my boyfriend being busy with school and I, quite the opposite, it is becoming increasingly difficult to see each other (even if we are not too far away). Relating it to statistics, when his workload increases, the amount of time we get to see each other decreases - it's a negative correlation.

One thing that is keeping my feet grounded is being understanding of his situation, and also being patient in waiting for the right time to see each other. Trust is also a big one too - I trust that he loves me.

This entry is a short one. But to summarize:

Understanding. Patience. Trust.

These are the key traits in a protecting and advancing a relationship.

Grow back down

One phrase: Nerf gun battles.

I found that ever since I entered high school, I have forgotten about having fun amongst all the work and stress; I forgot about being a kid.

Every year (or more like every term), my boyfriend's university puts on a Humans vs. Zombies tournament, so to speak. And they play using Nerf guns. I, being a girl and not very into shooting and things, had never touched a Nerf gun prior to this day. It also doesn't help that it is usually advertised as a "kid's toy".

I went over to his apartment and along with his roommates, we had several small Nerf gun battles. It was most definitely a fun experience.
Fun.
Every day, every night, I lock myself inside my room and all I do is study (with the occasional TV shows); work. All the time, I forget about going out, having fun, being a kid again.

The older we get, the more serious work gets laid upon us. All the more to grow back down again and embrace the inner child within ourselves.

My boyfriend has taught me, amongst many other things, to become a kid once in a while. Not worrying about anything, just having fun. Enjoying childish things like Nerf gun battles.

It was short, but definitely the most fun I have had in a while.

"Life is a journey, not a destination." - Ralph Waldo Emerson.

Where will this train take you?

Me?

I am finally in university, studying something that I am passionate about.

Music.

"Music?" you may ask.

I know it isn't business, or medicine, or engineering or anything that people claim will get you a job (because there totally aren't any jobs for musicians out there in the entire world - sarcasm intended), but it is my passion. 

Well, at least I think it is.

Life's Number 1 Lesson

I keep on saying this but if I learned something from these past few years, it's this.

You're feeling upset and having a crappy day, about to have a mental breakdown. That's a normal thing for everybody. There are good days, and there are bad days. This is life. So you just have to DEAL WITH IT.

Sure, at the beginning, you can talk to someone to get their advice on it, but as time progresses and the problem does not go away, there is nothing else that your confidant can do. They have done the best that they can do and in the end, how you feel is up to you and if you're still feeling crappy...you're the only one who can change that. Sure, confiding helps. But it won't mean anything if you don't take action. And if you dwell on the situation for too long...it starts to annoy your confidant. Believe me, I know, I start to grow weary and impatient.

Complaining about the situation will not do anything for you. So:

• Stop complaining.
• Think about how you can reverse your pain.
• Consider all that your confidants have told you - they tend to be right.
• If you cannot accept it and are not trying to make yourself happier, then...you are just digging your own grave. 
• You must truly want to feel happier and change this around.

Because you, and only you, can change how you feel.

Once Upon A Time...

There lived a young princess.

She had all the riches she could ever ask for.
She was kind-hearted and beautiful.
She had the most loyal, trustworthy friends in the world.
She and her family were very, very, very close.

Everybody thought she must have lived a very happy life.
Everybody but herself.

He took the midnight train going anywhere...

A summer's afternoon just three days ago, the world lost someone great.

A singer. An actor.

A son. A brother.

A friend. A lover.

An inspiration to many.

"Earth lost a person, but heaven gained an angel."

It was 3am the morning after when I found out about his passing.

Being a follower of Glee, I just didn't know how to take the news.

Speechless.

Confused.

Shocked.

Heartbroken.

I didn't know what to do.

And I still don't.

Just a mere two years ago, he was just couple feet away from me,
Singing and dancing on the stage with the rest of the Glee cast.
I had been an advent follower of Glee for the first three seasons (come the fourth, I got busy with school and could not find the time, but I followed the first half of the season), so Cory was a big part of my life - every Tuesday night. Finn Hudson was one of my favourite characters on the show, one I actually felt for.

It is a terrible loss, especially on his family, the cast, and Lea.
Please pray for all of them as well as for Cory's soul.

05.11.1981 - 07.13.2013
R.I.P. C.M. </3

"Be nice to everyone, always smile, and appreciate things, because it could all be gone tomorrow." - Cory Monteith.

3 Dolls, 2 Decorations, 1 Thought

Here is my tiny story of 3 dolls, 2 decorations, and 1 thought.

3 Dolls - March 2012.
While walking past some elderlies in a park, these handmade dolls caught my attention. A woman next to me told me that whenever she comes to the park, she sees this middle aged lady knitting dolls; she knits just for her own enjoyment. My first thoughts when I saw them were "Oh, these are so cute!" and the artisan asked me if I wanted to buy any. They were not very expensive, and I really liked her handicraft, so I bought them - 3 Dolls.

2 Decorations - December 2012.
Not too long ago, my aunt told me a story on how she went to help disabled children. The children there, although disabled, were very talented musicians and even made these little decorations, under the instruction and guidance of youth volunteers. My aunt had purchased a couple of these handmade decorations. After telling me the story, she showed them to me and subsequently gave them to me - 2 Decorations.

Appreciation Post

So, this little insignificant blog of mine has finally reached over 1100 views /cue applause

To be honest, I would have never thought that some posts would reach that many people.
I started it only as a way to channel my negative emotions and turn them into a positive, perhaps even inspirational lesson; I most definitely did not expect it to gain over 1000 views even in a year...

Okay, I had my hopes, but dreams don't necessarily always become reality, right?

Since this is titled 'Appreciation Post', I would like to show my gratitude and thanks towards any viewers who happen to stumble upon my blog and its posts. It makes me feel as if the things I say...or rather type...actually reach others, including individuals that are situated outside of my country.

Thank you all! <3
Minti

P.S. Don't forget to comment! I like to hear your responses and thoughts too :)

Providence.

prov·i·dence [prov-i-duh ns] The foreseeing and guardianship of God over His creatures...a manifestation of His divine care or direction (American College Dictionary)

This word has a lot of meaning to it, both in definition and in my life. 

So why am I talking about Providence?

First things first (this may be one of the most personal things will I blog about). 

The first time I actually learned about the word was through my teacher.

My best friend and I had written a song for our retreat.

We had one problem: we did not have a song name, and we were to perform it in a couple of minutes.

Our teacher just happened to mention the word Providence, all in coincidental terms.

One look and we knew that Providence would be the title of our song.

Since then, I have basically related everything back to Providence. It is kind of my ground, if you know what I mean.

Where I Am From

I am from teddy bears,

            from the numbers 225, 1, and 9.

I am from the sweet tastes of mango pudding and osmanthus flower and goji berry jelly,

            from shattered glass,

            to mended hearts.

I am from the mushroomed, bay-leafed smell of my Dad’s home-cooked roast beef,

            reminiscence of family times.

I am from the constant nagging of my mother,

            all in good intention for a better life.

I am from my ever wandering heart and from Providence,

            from late-night talks by the lake,

            and from 8 to 31 wise Romans who speak the truth.

I am from blood on two large intersecting pieces of wood,

            shed for humanity,

            and from the angels and saints.

I am from the loss of words,

            the search for words,

            and the pen is mightier than the sword.

I am from ribbons and leather,

            to laces and rubber,

            from satin to cotton,

            and from dolphins, to monkeys, to elephants.

I am from little black dots,

            dancing around oodles of pages of lines,

            from the 52 whites and the 36 blacks of life.

I am from worldy travels,

            a black Piccadilly and a silver Parker,

            and the rollercoaster ride of life.

I am from nobody is perfect, nobody can be the best,

            to I need to be perfect, I need to be the best.

Friends, Family, God;

            struggles, confidence, and love;

            this is where I am from.

------------------------------

This was something I wrote for a drama assignment (got 100%~) and is based of the original Where I Am From poem by George Ella Lyon. It can be found here: http://www.georgeellalyon.com/where.html

Little Thoughts and Tiny Lessons

So, I figured out that I'm not very good at organizing the thoughts in my head at all - there's always too much going on in my brain. It's like, there's so much I want to say but I don't know how to communicate it. I guess that's why I decided to start this blog in the first place, to communicate the little thoughts and tiny lessons I have in my head effectively.

Everything I write just seems to jump around, not getting the main point across. Here is a really good example of something I wrote in my drama class (the topic I had to write about was changes, by the way) without blocking any thoughts from my head:

Changes. Hmm…changes are things that can be for the good, or for the worse. I know I’ve changed even since last year. I see my friends change…I want to keep writing about changes but…my mind is just elsewhere today. I thought changes would be easy to write about. I guess not, with all the irrelevant action in my head. Ah…I just thought of my ISU when I was thinking about “head”…neuroscience! That’s my topic. Oh I really should do my ISU tonight. And action…I really want to read Percy Jackson right now, oddly enough. I’m almost done the 4^th, and then I’d be on to the 5^th one, which I totally forgot and it’s also the last book! Oh…I’ve completely streamed off again…shows just how jumbled up and unfocused my mind is. Easily distracted…bunny! Just kidding, I just thought of careers. And speaking of careers, the grade nines are having their trade show in the theatre area just below us right now. Changes. I should really “change” back to thinking about changes. Haha ironic isn’t it.

...I have no comment...

Anyways, I  just felt like posting this because it's kinda funny and it's just something I struggle with all the time. I hope that I will persevere and overcome.

Also the fact that I haven't posted in months.../guilt

The Real Me

You're right. I really do degrade myself too much and too often.
But that's only because there's nobody out there that knows the real me.
I believe that I am actually a tough cookie, they do not.
They think that I am a soft cookie/a marshmallow.
I am not.
They don't know the real me.

I am tougher than they think I am, more capable than they think I am.

I guess that's why I degrade myself so much, because I am given the impression that no one believes in me. Or more so, they cannot see my strengths or "tough side" and think that I am just some helpless, overly-nice "princess" who is a pushover.

In the long run, when people treat me like a degraded version of myself, I start to believe that I am actually a degraded version of myself, and start to put myself down.
This needs to change.

But how...?

*Once again, I had these brilliant thoughts in my head, but could not formulate them into words, making this blog post less effective and brilliant than it could have been. Oh well...great writing comes with a lot of practice.

Rollercoaster Ride

A picture is worth a thousand words, says a Chinese Proverb.

You can take it the figurative way, or the literal way: quote typographies.
Like this one right here - my current life, summarized through one picture.

Quote from The Perks Of Being A Wallflower.

This is actually not just my life, but every teenager's life. 

Think of it as the world's largest, scariest, most thrilling rollercoaster.
You're scared to go on it, yet you have to admit, you're a bit excited too; that's the deal with entering into the teenage years - you're really excited that you finally get more freedom, responsibility, and will feel older. 
However, that is the stage in life where most of the drama happens.
You're on a search for identity.

Reminiscing: Childhood

Reminiscing.
Nostalgia.
Memories.
They all mean the same thing (more or less).
Different people have different interpretations on these words, whether it be a recollection of their happy past, or a sad chapter that has passed.

Before I start, here is a little quiz for you to see if you can dig through that memory bank of yours and pull out where this screenshot is from:

If you really don't remember...maybe you were not from that decade or you've just simply never seen it before. I'll reveal the answer later on through this post. Whether or not this means anything to you, it surely means a lot to me and bring back a lot of nostalgic feelings from...over a decade ago.  

Nobody's Perfect

In this blog post, I'm going to be slightly more personal than in my previous ones.

The reason?

I need help.

And sometimes, the best help you can give yourself is to write to someone who is in a similar situation as yourself, helping yourself at the same time.

As much as people may want to be perfect, the truth is that nobody is perfect.
Humans were created with flaws, or else we'd have motivation and nothing to strive for if everything came to us perfectly.
I am a perfectionist.
And it's getting to the point where this characteristic of mine is becoming really unhealthy for my life.

Trying To Find A Place In This World

Do you ever get that feeling where you just don't know where you belong?
You have a great group of friends.
But you just feel so different from them.
You feel like you don't live how a normal teenager would live.

This is part of your quest for identity.
This is part of the identity crisis.
I 'suffer' from this almost every day of my life.
If not every day, every once in a while.
It's a normal thing for teenagers to feel - it's part of growing up.

You may experience tough times.
But these tough times will pass.
Sure, it may take some time.
But they will pass.

Don't stress too much on little things - just keep going on with life, because it will bring you everything you need to develop into who you are destined to be.

A Warm Welcome

Hello!

There are two possibilities you are here on my blog right now:

1. You are my friend or a follower, and I have shared the link to this blog with you.
2. You just so happened to stumble upon it.

I think the first possibility has higher probability than the second.

Anyways, I decided to start a blog because I always feel the need to be able to express myself somewhere through words. Tumblr used to be that for me, but now I feel that it's too...mainstream and popular and all the posts I see there are picture posts. There are no longer any more personal posts on my dashboard. People are competing for followers instead of expressing themselves. It's becoming a competition. I didn't feel comfortable anymore with blogging about my life on Tumblr anymore, so I decided to switch to a real blog. Don't get me wrong, I still love Tumblr, but I use that to express myself through pictures. 

I have the tendency to ramble on and on and not being able to get my main point across. I hope that blogging will help me on that as well.

Well, I gotta get used to the new Blogger site and spice up my blog theme a bit.

That's it for now.

Minti out.